|
| |
| Journal |
| |
|
|
| |
November 15th, 2006
Well I guess it will never come to pass. This year I came so close to doing it, to living out
every man's fantasy...the dream, the ultimate pinnacle, the final frontier for all men...Of
course, if you're a guy, you know what I'm talking about "The Threesome" (Audience
Gasps). Yes, you heard me right, Mitch Fatel actually came close to having a threesome but
in the long run, sadly, the deal would not be closed.
 |
|
Orgy
|
It wasn't for lack of trying however. This woeful tale begins in Detroit Michigan
(Threesome capital of the world and home to Eminem) about 3 months ago. It started with
a fine show and many excited fans including one hot girl (who will be referred to as
"Hottie") who asked me to meet her at a bar later that night. Being that I care so much
about my fans I could not let this young lady down. I arrived at the bar at the specified
time
and saw her immediately. However much to my chagrin (first time I've ever used that word
and I'm promising myself right now I will never use it again) I quickly noticed that she
had brought a friend with her. The friend, though really attractive, was on the heavier
side. We will refer to her as
"Chubby". My first thought was "Oh no" because every guy knows the friend can only mean
one thing, there is masturbation in your near future. The night quickly took a welcome
turn
however when they both started flirting with me and
touching my legs. As every guy knows once the leg is touched the penis takes over from
there. Since this is the case I think it is now a good time to let my penis guest comment
from his perspective. Mitch's Penis:
Thanks Mitch, I got it from here. As Mitch has mentioned the two girls, Hottie and Chubby
were now flirting with Mitch at the bar. Now as we all know Mitch has become way to
famous to have sex with just "Chubby" maybe when he was an open miker, but he has
definitely moved on to a higher echelon of woman due to his many television and radio
appearances. However, a porker mixed with a hot girl
makes for one fantastic story and so Mitch gave me the okay to court both of these young
ladies. I'll now hand this back to Mitch: Thanks Penis! So
at this point I'm sitting there having both my
legs rubbed and I start thinking, "Holy shit, could this be the night that I finally take a
journey
into magical territory?" Knowing only a few lucky men have pulled off this feat before me
only fueled my desire. My answer would soon come in the form of a lovely question
from the hottie, and I quote "Lets all go skinny dipping in your hot tub."
"Everything is possible through Jesus!" I thought and quickly exited with my harem and
made our way up to my room. Never was I more excited then this moment. However, there
was one small problem, the fact that in 2 minutes we would be in my room and I would
have to answer for the fact I didn't have a hot tub. As soon as we walked in, Hottie
exclaimed, "Where's the hot tub?" I was like "Oh wow, look at that, it's just a tub! Huh,
look at that, oh well, lets just all get naked and shower." That idea was quickly
quashed as we all kind of realized Chubby probably wouldn't fit in good for this scenario.
So at this point they just got on the bed and started watching TV as I frantically searched
my brain for ways to save the dream. I excused myself to go get ice so that I could think
things
through. Calling the other comic for roofies was out of the question because it was about
2AM. I walked back in a beaten man. However, my sadness quickly turned to
elation as I saw that while I was away Chubby had removed her mini-skirt and
was laying there in nothing but sexy heart panties. "It's on!" I thought.
"The dream is alive!" I got on the bed and immediately Chubby and I started making out.
Hottie was just watching TV so doing my manly duty I quickly moved to get her involved.
"Why don't you join us?" I queried. At that point you would have totally thought this was
going to happen. I started making out with both of them, and Chubby
started rubbing my penis. I then took off hotties pants and at this point if you were a
betting man you would think your payoff was in the bag. Sadly though, I cannot tell a lie as
this story has a tragic ending.
As I now know you can never count your vagina's before they hatch. Suddenly out of
nowhere the hottie
says, "Why don't you guys just have a good time, I'm going to watch TV." and just like that
my dreams go poof.
 |
|
Been there.... done that.
|
Now suddenly Chubby starts going crazy, pulls me in the bathroom and suddenly this
threesome now becomes me reliving
every sexual experience from high school. I do have to be honest, it was great sex, I forgot
how hard chubby girls will work for you, but still, it wasn't a threesome. The next day
I was so confused as to what happened and lo and behold hottie e-mails me and tells me
she basically chickened out because she had never done it before. Then she gives me all
these lines about how badly she
still wants me and the next time I'm in her town she can't wait to prove it. She even said
she will bring another girl and make my dreams come true. I will let you know
if this actually comes to pass but I'm not holding my breath and
neither should you.
Now just a few things before I sign off. First, I was so proud to win the Sirius World Series
of Comedy this month. I really didn't think I had a chance as I was up against some
formidable competition. But my fans came through for me and brought this longshot all
the way and I want to thank everyone for voting for me. You guys really take care of me an
I just want to let you know it means a lot to me and makes up for the fact my parents beat
me. Also, for everyone whose been asking about my Comedy Central
special.
I was told they will give me the exact date soon and when they do I promise to drop
everyone an e-mail (sign up using the form at the top right side of the page if you're new
to the Mitch Fatel Experience).
 |
|
Thank you everyone for voting for me!
|
I'm really excited about it because if it's as well received on TV as it was live I'm going to
be a big star and not only have threesomes but foursomes. Jesus, imagine having a
foursome, four vaginas arranged in diagonals on your bed.
I would be out of my mind. Since I'm OCD and would want to make sure I got everyone an
equal amount of time I think I would set a timer. 4 per vagina, maybe 3 for the chubby
one. I'm sure that will leave her very chagrined...fuck!
Mitch
CURRENT JOURNAL
November 2007
May 2007
November 2006
May 2006
Journal Archive
|
|
| |
|
|
|
| |
| © Copyright Mitch Fatel |
|
 |
|
|
|
FOLLOW MY OTHER SITES
|
|
|
| |
|
